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Thursday, August 02, 2007

Yay for panic attacks.
After two hours of nonstop uncontrollable laughing, now huddled in bed crying.
Fun isn't it.
Every night.
I'm tired.

The clothes are refusing to dry properly.
The apartment smells like cat food.
I can't concentrate to the point that I haven't touched a single text since two weeks that uni has started and yesterday bolted from Contracts.
In despair because I'm constantly thinking there's a really huge sharp knife in the drawer.
I have no idea how to survive this semester.
The only thing I had was to get a cat which I probably won't be able to take care of.
I am exhausted everyday from cleaning, walking, sitting, thinking.
How desperate.

Boy.
You come by every night with food.
I appreciate that I starve a little less.
Everytime you're the reminder of the little things which hurt, which doesn't deserve to hurt me anymore. To get rid of them does that mean I have to lose you?
Sigh.
What role do I play in your life as a friend, hm?

I am reminded I have another month to live.

Mused by Sukunami Taka around 11:50 PM

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